Father Musings… changing who I am.
by Ron P on Jun.01, 2009, under Uncategorized
How often do people actually change?
For me, I know I’ve changed a lot over the last decade or so, yet somehow I deal with the same issues I’ve dealt with since I was a kid. Lack of patience, I’m quick to anger, in general I prefer solitude to the company of others. When do these things change? Will they ever?
Those questions bother me a lot, because I don’t want to be angry. I don’t want to yell at my son who is just being an energetic 4 year old. Sometimes I’m great at the path Lisa and I have chosen. I communicate, I educate, I bend my will and replace old programming. Other days are more like last night where I’m yelling at him because he’s kicking a ball in the kitchen or getting into his late night manic phase and I’m just tired of it.
I strive for change. I fail constantly, but I’m still striving. Maybe who I am will never really change this late in my life, but hopefully I can just smooth the edges out a little bit. Live with a little more harmony and a little less anger.
